Thursday, May 6, 2010
Tears of the Saints
This morning I woke up much later than I had hoped and knew there was no way I was going to make my appointment, so I decided to just take my time getting ready. So I was on facebook and found this video posted by one of the girls on my India team. Take a minute to watch it, its so amazing! http://vimeo.com/2843450 After watching this video, I had a realization moment and knew that this summer was going to be intense! So I took some time to pray for the girls on my team and I just became so overwhelmed with God's love for me and His incredible grace that He pours out on me. This trip to India this summer is going to be amazing! And I pray that God uses us to reach thousands of these women, showing them the light and love of Christ. It got me thinking and questioning why God gave me such an incredible life and why He chose me to grow up knowing His name and His love. I want the children in the slums where we are going, to be able to grow up knowing His name. I want to reach the unreached, touch the untouchable, love the unlovable, and make His glorious name known. This is not only my prayer for the next to months, but this is the prayer for my life. God has an incredible summer planned and I cannot wait to see what happens!
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Goodbye Junior Year
A lot has happened in the past three weeks. First off, I turned 21! YAY, except the fact that it was right in the midst of last tests and finals. But it was still great spending time with great sisters and friends on a long study break. I went through a long debate about drinking. I've never had a drink before, and of course I got asked a lot if I would. I debated, and I already knew I would not drink around people who didn't know how I felt about it. I don't think it is ok to get drunk (the Bible talks against it), I hate what drinking leads to, and while I may be fine to drink one drink, that may tell a friend struggling with alcohol that its ok for them to drink too since a "Christian" is drinking, which could cause them to stumble away from Christ. For me, it's not ok to cause a brother or sister or anyone for that matter to stumble, its just not worth it, so for now I have come to the decision not to drink. Then we had formal the next day...God has blessed me with some of the most incredible friends and strong brothers and sisters in Christ. I spent over half of formal in some awesome and sometimes deep conversation about walking with Christ! How awesome is that!
Finals went by slowly but surely and I managed to pull three all nighters in a row with many short naps during the day. Then just as finals came to an end, I called my mom to tell her I was done, to that she had some news for me, my grandad was in the hospital waiting to have a heart valve replacement and a triple bypass surgery! So needless to say, Ive spent much of this week in the hospital. But on the other hand, it has been great spending time with my parents and my aunt Melanie. Grandad is doing great for an 80 year old who just had heart surgery and he just moved out of ICU today! So now we can visit anytime during the day we want, which is great! We are also looking at rehab nursing homes so he can get back to his old self! Which I fully believe he will! Knowing him he will be out of rehab and back at home in 6 weeks and out doing yard work or whatever by the fall. We have to work hard to get him so slow down sometimes.
Also this week, I got to go eat lunch with one of my friends out it Gainesville and go to a store called Rehabs Rope. This summer I am going on a mission trip to Bangalore and Goa, India to work with women in the sex trade industry and their kids in the slums through an organization called Rehab's Rope. The store in Gainesville sells purses, jewelry, quilts, and other things made by these women. So it was really great and exciting to see that! Also, I have decided to read the Bible all the way through chronologically in a year! So I am starting that today, on May 1! I am very excited about it and cannot wait to learn about His word! But yeah, this is where I am in my life right now, and it's about time to go so I can read His word before I go to sleep!
Finals went by slowly but surely and I managed to pull three all nighters in a row with many short naps during the day. Then just as finals came to an end, I called my mom to tell her I was done, to that she had some news for me, my grandad was in the hospital waiting to have a heart valve replacement and a triple bypass surgery! So needless to say, Ive spent much of this week in the hospital. But on the other hand, it has been great spending time with my parents and my aunt Melanie. Grandad is doing great for an 80 year old who just had heart surgery and he just moved out of ICU today! So now we can visit anytime during the day we want, which is great! We are also looking at rehab nursing homes so he can get back to his old self! Which I fully believe he will! Knowing him he will be out of rehab and back at home in 6 weeks and out doing yard work or whatever by the fall. We have to work hard to get him so slow down sometimes.
Also this week, I got to go eat lunch with one of my friends out it Gainesville and go to a store called Rehabs Rope. This summer I am going on a mission trip to Bangalore and Goa, India to work with women in the sex trade industry and their kids in the slums through an organization called Rehab's Rope. The store in Gainesville sells purses, jewelry, quilts, and other things made by these women. So it was really great and exciting to see that! Also, I have decided to read the Bible all the way through chronologically in a year! So I am starting that today, on May 1! I am very excited about it and cannot wait to learn about His word! But yeah, this is where I am in my life right now, and it's about time to go so I can read His word before I go to sleep!
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
First post!
So I wrote this blog two weeks ago because I was having an overwhelming day and I'm just now posting it because one of my amazing friends made my blog but wouldn't give me the password until finals were over! So here is my blog from a couple weeks ago:
I’m sitting here in my apartment today after a long and intense day. First of all, my sister in Christ, Lindsey is making my blog for me, but is not yet allowing me to blog, not until finals are over another two weeks. But I couldn’t resist, God has just been exploding my heart today and I just had to explode my heart a little bit myself. So…first was just class, then I went to my bible study with all my YL leader friends and we learned a lot about a couple, Mike and Cabell Sweeney. Shawn is the YL area director where I was a leader and Kathryn his wife has been pouring into me for the past two and half years and now Kathryn leads this bible study. Mike was Shawn’s YL leader who mentored him and was the man God used to bring Shawn to himself.Sweeney has been battling cancer and died just a week before Easter. Kathryn has kept us updated on the situation as the two were really close, we had prayed for them as a small group and learned a lot about Sweeney and his wife Cabell. Although I’ve never met either of them they both seem like two of the most amazing and influential people for a lot of people and their walks with Christ. Sweeney touched thousands of lives just by allowing God to move through him. Cabell has been writing a journal online for people to read about Sweeney and her feelings toward the situation (Mike’s cancer and death). I have never met a women as strong as her and able to trust in the Lord so much amidst her darkest moment. Instead, she even looks at it as one of her brighter moments in the fact that God allowed her to be a part of this! She admits her suffering but relies on Christ for strength. After that I had a conversation with a very close friend of mine. Only this friend is really hard to get much closer to because she doesn’t understand nor does she even care to understand my relationship with Christ and what He means to me and my life, the fact that He is my life. She believes in Him, but doesn’t realize there is a WHOLE lot more than that to God!! She doesn’t think it’s even important to go to church or bible study, or even talk about it for that matter, a little prayer once in a while is plenty. Then I went to my small group tonight, but instead we went to a bigger bible study which was incredible. They did it questions and answers style this night, and it was incredible. They talked about some incredible questions like, is it possible to lose salvation, how was salvation obtained before Christ came, and what do you tell someone who thinks that church isn’t important as a Christian, that it is in fact very important. These questions hit me hard! I have been struggling with the fact that some of my very close friends say they are Christians, but they don’t realize there is a difference between that and following Christ! I mean heck, Satan believes in God, but he doesn’t follow Him. As my mind runs through this very intense day of thoughts, MY LIFE HAS TO CHANGE! I don’t have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way He loves us! Oh how He loves us! It hit me today, that Sweeney and Cabell are no different from me other than the fact that they allow God to move through them and truly want to do with their lives whatever means it takes to bring God the most glory! I want my life to reflect God in a way that people look at my life and coming running to Christ. Yet recently it feels as if my life has done quite the opposite in many instances and I it makes me wonder if I am doing something majorly wrong. Sometimes I feel as though I’m not producing fruit in Christ, and I’m tired of standing still, I am so overwhelmed with emotions and just want to go out and do something amazing for His kingdom. But God is continuously telling me everyday “sit at His feet, drink the cup in His hand, lay against Him and breathe, and to feel His heart beat.” God has been doing a lot of growing in me this year and a lot of teaching. I’ve always tried to be a leader and God has taken me out of those positions so that He can teach me to rest in Him and to be intimate with Him. It has been incredible! And now, I stand at a point where I am so impatient, excited, and a little bit nervous to see what God has planned next in my life! All I know is that my life is going to make a change for His name sake. I want to be blessed by Him by being a part in bringing millions of people to Christ! God says to ask, and He will give the nations to you (Psalm 2)! That’s what makes me nervous yet excited, the fact that God has a HUGE plan, and I have no idea what that is, nor can I fathom it!
I’m sitting here in my apartment today after a long and intense day. First of all, my sister in Christ, Lindsey is making my blog for me, but is not yet allowing me to blog, not until finals are over another two weeks. But I couldn’t resist, God has just been exploding my heart today and I just had to explode my heart a little bit myself. So…first was just class, then I went to my bible study with all my YL leader friends and we learned a lot about a couple, Mike and Cabell Sweeney. Shawn is the YL area director where I was a leader and Kathryn his wife has been pouring into me for the past two and half years and now Kathryn leads this bible study. Mike was Shawn’s YL leader who mentored him and was the man God used to bring Shawn to himself.Sweeney has been battling cancer and died just a week before Easter. Kathryn has kept us updated on the situation as the two were really close, we had prayed for them as a small group and learned a lot about Sweeney and his wife Cabell. Although I’ve never met either of them they both seem like two of the most amazing and influential people for a lot of people and their walks with Christ. Sweeney touched thousands of lives just by allowing God to move through him. Cabell has been writing a journal online for people to read about Sweeney and her feelings toward the situation (Mike’s cancer and death). I have never met a women as strong as her and able to trust in the Lord so much amidst her darkest moment. Instead, she even looks at it as one of her brighter moments in the fact that God allowed her to be a part of this! She admits her suffering but relies on Christ for strength. After that I had a conversation with a very close friend of mine. Only this friend is really hard to get much closer to because she doesn’t understand nor does she even care to understand my relationship with Christ and what He means to me and my life, the fact that He is my life. She believes in Him, but doesn’t realize there is a WHOLE lot more than that to God!! She doesn’t think it’s even important to go to church or bible study, or even talk about it for that matter, a little prayer once in a while is plenty. Then I went to my small group tonight, but instead we went to a bigger bible study which was incredible. They did it questions and answers style this night, and it was incredible. They talked about some incredible questions like, is it possible to lose salvation, how was salvation obtained before Christ came, and what do you tell someone who thinks that church isn’t important as a Christian, that it is in fact very important. These questions hit me hard! I have been struggling with the fact that some of my very close friends say they are Christians, but they don’t realize there is a difference between that and following Christ! I mean heck, Satan believes in God, but he doesn’t follow Him. As my mind runs through this very intense day of thoughts, MY LIFE HAS TO CHANGE! I don’t have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way He loves us! Oh how He loves us! It hit me today, that Sweeney and Cabell are no different from me other than the fact that they allow God to move through them and truly want to do with their lives whatever means it takes to bring God the most glory! I want my life to reflect God in a way that people look at my life and coming running to Christ. Yet recently it feels as if my life has done quite the opposite in many instances and I it makes me wonder if I am doing something majorly wrong. Sometimes I feel as though I’m not producing fruit in Christ, and I’m tired of standing still, I am so overwhelmed with emotions and just want to go out and do something amazing for His kingdom. But God is continuously telling me everyday “sit at His feet, drink the cup in His hand, lay against Him and breathe, and to feel His heart beat.” God has been doing a lot of growing in me this year and a lot of teaching. I’ve always tried to be a leader and God has taken me out of those positions so that He can teach me to rest in Him and to be intimate with Him. It has been incredible! And now, I stand at a point where I am so impatient, excited, and a little bit nervous to see what God has planned next in my life! All I know is that my life is going to make a change for His name sake. I want to be blessed by Him by being a part in bringing millions of people to Christ! God says to ask, and He will give the nations to you (Psalm 2)! That’s what makes me nervous yet excited, the fact that God has a HUGE plan, and I have no idea what that is, nor can I fathom it!
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